Happy Monday, y’all!
It’s one of those days. The kind where I can’t keep my focus. Every time I start something, I get sidetracked by … well, by pretty much everything. The candle sitting on my desk, the blinds not being open in my craft room, the laundry, the dogs, lunch, ordering a nail file because I’ve needed a new one for a long time.
Now do you see?
So, I thought perhaps I should sit down and type it all up. Get it out there.
This week I was hoping to get started on Chain Reaction, the next Brantley Walker: Off the Books book. 🤪 But then I decided to check over the last couple of chapters for Rule. I did that, and I’m happy with it. Thrilled, in fact. And I was before I checked it. I love that book because I love Rule. Now it’s time for beta, edits, proofs, and all the fun things that come after the story is on paper.
I should be moving forward.
But I still haven’t started Chain Reaction.
Why? Well, because there are 999 other things that seem more important, although they probably aren’t. It’s just that I can’t calm the noise in my head.
When my thoughts turn chaotic, I’ve got a few ways of dealing with it. Most of them aren’t exactly healthy, I’m sure. It used to be that I would rearrange the furniture. I’d pick a room, mentally redesign it, and then get to work making it happen. My reasoning is that if I rearrange, it’ll feel new, and therefore, the chaos will go away. It took me a while (several years) to realize that wasn’t healthy.
Doesn’t usually work. Not for long, anyway. Especially since the chaos will come back, and moving furniture isn’t exactly my favorite thing, so I’ve been doing my best not to resort to redesigning the house. When I get the urge, I tell myself I can do it, but not for two weeks. Not until I am absolutely sure I want it that way. I’ve gotten to the point when I have stopped obsessing for two weeks and then changing it. I’m breaking the habit and learning to live with the furniture as it is.
Of course, I replaced that compulsion with another.
In the last few months, I started cleaning the house when I couldn’t stay focused. It got me out of my chair and away from my desk, but then that became an obsession. To the point where even the slightest speck of dust (or, in our case, golden retriever glitter – a.k.a. dog hair) would have me doing the same chore I just did yesterday. Sure, my house is clean, but I’ve simply converted the chaos into something else. Obsession.
I thought I would give this a try. Rambling. At the very least, you get a glimpse into my chaotic mind. It doesn’t bother me that you know.
Hmm. I actually do feel a little better. Maybe it’s time to get back to doing something productive. Like writing.
Hope you have a great week!